Foster care and adoption is rooted in trauma and loss so you and your child may be living with the daily effects of development delays, impairments, grief, shame and lingering trauma. As the parent, you have the unique opportunity to model Christ’s unfailing love as you walk with your child on the road to healing. In The Connected Child, the authors wisely share, “Not only have these children lost out on months or years of healthy developmental growth, but now they also have to unlearn the unhealthy strategies they’ve become accustomed to using.” (p. 35) While you may have established previous parenting styles, parenting children who’ve faced trauma may need different approaches and techniques. So, not only is your child unlearning unhealthy strategies, but you are likely unlearning traditional parenting techniques and learning new ones that better match the needs of your child and help them thrive as a unique and wonderful person, created in the image of God.
At times, the journey will not be easy, yet direction and hope is found in knowing healing comes through relationship, a growing, healthy relationship with your child and a growing, healthy relationship with God. You have the God-given role of building relationship with your child and walking alongside her towards healing. Along the way, God may very well be doing a healing work in your heart and using this relationship to help you grow and even thrive as His unique and wonderful creation.